Work Sucks, and Then People Die
by Jero
Summary: Slash! Xander has a bad day at work.


Xander had been working in the deli of the local grocery store for seven months now, he was starting to get fed up with the various night managers. But especially Mike. Mike was annoying and obnoxious, and he refered to himself as 'the Grocery Store Dad'. Though behind his back, everyone called his either 'the Grocery Store Grandpa' or 'the Grocery Nazi'. And he had this weird habit of going into the breakroom, and if there were more than two people in there, saying, "If this room were to be struck by lightening, we'd all be dead."  
  
But that wasn't the worse of it. Ever since the night a few weeks back when Mike had come into the deli area, 'the Cave' as it was referred to by the other employees, and startled Xander into ruining a cake he'd been decorating, Mike would walk into the Cave chanting, "Hello, hello, hello in the deli, don't want to scare you, hello, hello." Xander was ready to kill him.  
  
Tonight was the last straw. Just because he closed the deli five nights a week, Mike automatically blamed him for every little thing that didn't get done on the two nights he didn't work.  
  
"Xander, I thought I told you to dump the coffee grounds at night," said Mike, when Xander walked by. "They weren't dumped last night."  
  
Xander gritted his teeth, trying not to fly off the handle. "Well, why are you telling me? I didn't work last night. I always dump them when I work."  
  
"No you don't. They didn't get dumped Monday night either."  
  
"I don't work here on Mondays," snapped Xander. "Why do you always blame me for everything?"  
  
Mike was apparently surprised. "Because you're the one who works the most."  
  
"And does the most work! Not only am I the only cake decorator right now, but Jennie and Marley don't even do the little bit of work that they're supposed to, and then I'm the one who gets yelled at! Jennie doesn't clean the slicer half the time! Marley never cleans the rotisserie. So I'm the one who ends up doing their work, too! I'm surprised they even get the coffee dumped at night, so forget the grounds!"  
  
"Now, Xander."  
  
"Oh, shove it! You're fucking biased! You give me a hard time about this, then expect me to go tell them what they're not doing. And you won't tell them because they're pretty little girls! If you're so worried about it, tell Laura, or Dick! Hell, tell Lois for all I care! I DO NOT have authority over Jennie and Marley, so telling me about it does no good! And if you think it does, you can go fuck yourself! I am not them! I do my job!" Xander stormed off, leaving Mike, and the three cashiers, two stockboys, and several customers staring after him in shock.  
  
Mike followed Xander into the Cave, when Xander was angrily shredding chicken with a sharp knife. "Look, Xander, if you've got a problem with me, don't bring it up in front of the customers.  
  
"Me! Have a problem with you?!" Xander started chopping even faster. "You're the one who brought everything up! I only tell it like it is!" Xander glared at Mike when he began to respond. "Yes, I have a problem with you! You're still breathing!" Then he walked around the table and ripped Mike's throat open with his knife. "And now I don't have a problem with you at all."  
  
Tearing off his blood spattered apron, Xander tossed it near the dying night manager and dropped the knife next to it. "By the way, I quit."  
  
"I should turn you in."  
  
"But you won't. Why else would I come to you?" Xander tilted his head. "Aside from the sex. But you can make Xander Harris cease to exist."  
  
"Actually, he's already dead. They found the body in one of the cemeteries in Sunnydale. Poor boy, committed suicide on one of the graves. Lex, you drive me insane with the shit you pull sometimes." He smiled at Xander. "As soon as I heard, I pulled a few strings. Here."  
  
Xander accepted id cards, social security cards, a birth certificate, and few other things from his lover. "Lex MacDonald? I like it."  
  
"Wolfram and Hart is willing to let you work for them. With your research skills, they decided you'd be perfect as my aide." Lindsey grinned and drew Xander into his arms, kissing the younger man lightly on the lips. "Just think," he whispered seductively, "we'll be together all the time."  
  
"Can we fuck in the office? Like the first time?"  
  
"Of course." 


End file.
